The Worst Bathroom I've Ever Seen

Location: First (?) Floor Battle Hall

Utilities: 4 Urinals, 2 Sinks, Soap Dispensers, Paper Towels, 3 "stalls"

I figure I ought to begin with the bathroom that inspired it all.

The location is pretty manageable. I first discovered it while walking from Dobie towards the West Mall. There is a pair of unassuming doors off of inner campus drive next to an outdoor set of stairs. I walked in and only had to turn a few corners to find the gates of hell.

When you walk in you can already tell something is wrong. The sinks are not attached to the wall, not including the pipes, but are rather balanced on a single porcelain leg. This is clearly a sign of the devil's magic at work. They are also roughly the size of bath tubs which make them great for washing blood off of your forearms.

The urinals seem fine enough, and the smell isn't even really that bad. But this is all probably because this bathroom never gets used due to the fact that...

THE STALLS ARE HORRIFYING. Now I'm not saying they are unclean or anything. They're relatively sanitary. Its actually the toilets themselves. You see, most common public restroom have a flat porcelain top on which a plastic seat can be rested. For whatever reason the plastic seat has an opening at the front so that the seat doesn't make a complete oval. On these toilets, instead of a flat porcelain top to the toilet the porcelain at the front is raised about an inch and a half, and the toilet is just short enough that sitting on it comfortably means resting your genitals on this nasty raised bit. This is all compounded by the fact that the plastic seats aren't even designed for this type of toilet. Instead, the part of the seat that would overlap with the porcelain has just been sheared off and not cleanly either, so it just jabs into your leg the whole time. The entire experience feels like a tiny man is simultaneously holding your junk up with one hand and stabbing your leg with the other.

So that's it. The most poorly designed bathroom I've ever been in. I give it zero flushes out of five (and a get the hell out of there while you're at it). Consequently that is the baseline for my bathroom scale, so keep that in mind as I review others.